Four million Seven Hundred Thousand and Ninety Six.

Fred lived on an island. He had one leg. Nobody cared.


Lucy lived on a boat. She was always seasick. Nobody cared.


Pedro ate corn. He didn’t care, neither did anyone else.


Sally drank diarrhea. She cared, but nobody else did.


Zurgenstein discovered the moon. Everyone cared but him. . .

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Liquid Jerry and The Blue Bikini Beauty

The Blue Bikini Beauty captivated Liquid Jerry. Her lemon hair swooped under her slender shoulders like a wet mop as she approached the beach bar. She smiled. Majestic trumpets sounded, and this once-dull-day filled with a light he’d never known.

Liquid sighed, then faced the bar and drank. His brain turned to jelly as the shrunken cubes tapped the stubble on his upper lip like cold fingertips. The whiskey river was gasoline in his gullet. When Liquid finished, he looked like a drunken Loony-Toon.

“‘Ow ‘bout another?”

“Make that two.” Hot breath brushed by Liquid’s right earlobe. He turned, and there she was—The Blue Bikini Beauty.

“If that’s okay with you.”

Okay? Well, that, milady…would be an understatement. I mean…uhh…hehm!…yeah…uh-ehhm-ehhr! Sure…Fine! Do whatever the hell you want, it bein’ a free world n’ all…”

Liquid hated himself.

Baldie Bartender tried sliding their drinks from the other end of the bar, but only made it halfway. Liquid Jerry and Blue Bikini Beauty glanced at each other with excited grins.

Then, the world exploded.

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It’s Right Around The Corner

Hey didn’t I see you with a ticket stub in your hand?

See you there!

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Borange And Mr. Toast First Interaction

Only a rough draft, but here it is:

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Street Root Volume 5 Has Hit The (Metaphorical) Shelves (Of The Internet)!!

Click The Cover Art To Enter. I hope you’re wearing a wet suit…

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Flying Pizza?

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Seems like a nice place…

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